Well the other day i went out for lunch with a few friends and it was quite fun, we had nandos then some desserts, while having desserts we were chatting about stuff; funny stuff and throughout we were talking about girls and one of my friends said about me 'ill choose a more decent looking one hahahaaha' and it was really hmm ouch.. but i know they were joking and stuff but then that kinda cut me deep and its stuck inside me like that sentence just pops up now and then and really it is just.. ouch :/ but i know he wasnt serious, and he is a good friend but it made me feel even more insecure now i feel like giving up on so much stuff now thats why i sit alone at school during breaks and i've turned into such an anti-social person.
Its because im giving up on society im getting tired and its just so depressing, people just are never satisfied with peoples effort. Im more likely to be known as a person thats so open and you can joke about my appearance, my weight etc.. but really as i grow older i start to realize its not a so-called joke anymore it acutally hurts but you still have to laugh it off so people wont think "omg your such a sensitive person. wtf. you cant even take a joke" lol joke?
I think people need to start understanding the true meaning of a 'joke' and where the line hits and i know im ugly im fat. but really, its starting to hurt when people say; oh why dont you ask judy to go with you or etc, and people just laugh and say LOL JUDY?! NOWAY and then hahahahah im joking!!! but if you joke like that, then its really what you think but to not make tension you say 'im joking'. Aye?
Im getting older and im starting to become more feminine each year, i want to be treated as a 'girl', just a TAD BIT. But is it too late for people to understand now? When i say that it doesnt mean you cant joke and stuff but its just; Hey im a girl too.. yea? :/
Everyone has been through the phase of life where they're all tomboy and shit,.
And im sure everyone has their side where they look the best but its just not the appropriate occasion to show it yet..
I really loved a friends blogtitle and that is(changed it abit);
"Let me be lovely,.. Just for once :')"
