Lately

Sigh its been a long time since i updated. Ive been going through the phase of antisocialness
hmmmm well ive been sick for the whole week and i stayed home the whole week :D anyway i want to update my blog so i asked for ideas


THOUGHTS.

hmmm i think that our generation is going too quick.. like we do things or think about things that are like waaaaay too ahead of us. like working or social or watever idk. were going to work for our whole adult life and it will eventually become a drudgery for us, why do people want to work so young?? i only want to for fun HAHA nah. but im not allowed so GUTS. anyway. and um i try to control myself and tell myself that im only 15 and i still have plenty of time to play but its so hard.. WHY is it so HARD to control. i think its cause of the people around me l0l. i chopped my hair cause i wanted to stop caring about my looks cause its too hard to impress people now. im looking forward to uni so  bad, cause idk.. i meet more and new people i guess? hmmm argh SO mixed thoughts.. i think i think too much too. im such a loner now, no one believes me but i actually am. i stay home every weekend not like last year and 2010 anymore lol. i remember i used to go out like every weekend till like midnight and think i was cool as, but now when i think back its like so stupid and the generations are getting worst(?) and worse(?) in my opinion. they are getting more rude and annoying and bitchy and slutty  and i hate it when people younger than me look freaking10 years older than me. sometimes i still miss the parties and the fun... im so lonely :( and i want to be friends with certain peoples but i just CANT cause i try to but when im with them and they do that thing i just lose it i really really want to argh asdkfj;lkjgds.

HATES.

i dont hate anyone now since i have been so anti social lol. but um i think people starting to hate me so sad so sad. i seriously dont hate anyone if i rage about someone i only think their annoying i DONT HATE ==

TO DO's

i need to save up money to buy stuff, im going to go shopping in the holidays and i really want a pair of darn vans and raybans!. so sad going shopping by myself sigh.. and i need to loose f!#$ing weight like no shit oml--

i wish i had a friend whose like similar to me not looks but like personality or watever and i could like talk to them and like just go out for a cup of coffee and chill.. and i can trust them and but i cant seem to find one-- thats just in my imagination. sadlife. thats why im looking forward to uni cause maybe that friend will come :D

ahha... i have no idea what ive been saying but if you know me, my thoughts change like 24/7 im only typing what i think at this specific moment cause im so friggen bored. l0l